Breaking Up With Kindness

The ending of a love relationship is often painful and dramatic. In “Hey, That’s No Way to Say Goodbye,” Leonard Cohen has penned a poetic plea for a graceful, respectful breakup that honors the beauty of a dying connection, rather than dwelling on the pain, anger, and lingering regret of the ending.

Cohen wrote the song in 1966 on a decrepit bed in the Penn Terminal Hotel in Midtown Manhattan. In 1967, Judy Collins, who became Cohen’s good friend, recorded the song for her album  Wildflowers. The following month, Cohen’s own version was released on his debut album, Songs of Leonard Cohen.

Cohen described the song as “a moment of clarity in the middle of a love affair’s end.” He also explained, “It’s about acknowledging that love changes but doesn’t truly die. The bodies may part, but the connection remains in the light and the words left behind.”

While introducing “Hey, That’s No Way to Say Goodbye” during his 1976 Live at Montreux performance, Cohen memorably said: “As you eastern metaphysicians know, just as from the darkest mud blooms the whitest lotus, so from the brownest hotel room you occasionally get a good song.”

Playing heartfelt, beautiful songs like this one juices me up. Enjoy this cover version.